Today we’re featuring a guest post from Erica Johnson from Inner Parents! She’s a mother of two and is super passionate about parenting & baby products. Today, she will be guiding you four reasons you need to stop stressing while handling your kids! So let’s get started.
Are you feeling stressed? You should know that you are not alone. In fact, 70% of moms in the U.S. say that mothering is an “incredibly stressful: experience. 96% felt that they were more stressed out than their mothers were while raising a child.
Consider what might be triggering this angst; too many commitments, financial insecurities, higher expectations of our children, and relationship demands are just some of the causes of stressed out parents.
Perhaps more significant than the cause of our stress is the way that it affects our family’s well being. Yes, that means are kids too. Studies reveal that a parents overall ability to manage stress is a very strong indicator of the quality of a parent’s relationship with their child and how happy their children are in life.
Experts and InnerParents agree on these 4 important reasons to stop stressing while you are handling your kids.
- You lash out at your child
If you are a parent, then you know how it feel like to be in the middle of a very stressful situation or phone call, only to have your child interrupt. A general reaction is to snap or yell at your child. A 2014 study showed that when mothers are stressed, their children tend to mirror their mother’s distressed heart rhythms and produce more stress hormones. Stress in young children can inhibit early development and comfort-ability around others.
- You are unsupportive and disengaged.
Other mothers, especially those that have grown up in a household with constant stress, get easily burnt-out. When their toddlers were in distress, these mothers often acted unsupportive and disengaged. In this environment, children receive less help developing healthy coping mechanisms, receive less physical attention, and grow toxic stress effects in the brain. Nurturing touch and emotional warmth can combat these effects.
Are you feeling stressed? Your not alone!
- You make your child feel guilty.
How many times have you arrived at home from a long and stressful day at work only to realize that you son has soccer practice? Or the times when money has been tight financially and your teacher says that your child needs a $100 graphic calculator or money for a field trip? Negative reactions to these situations can cause your child to feel guilty for things that are out of their control. The Children, Youth and Family Consortium of the University of Minnesota suggest using secondary control coping techniques to handle these types of stressful situations.
- You stress your kids out.
As parents we don’t mean to stress out our kids. However, the truth is that your stress levels as a parent can and do affect your child’s cognition. Author of Kids Pick Up on Everything: How Parental Stress in Toxic to Kids, says this is because tension is contagious.
While you most certainly don’t need to “fake” being happy in front of your kids all of the time, teaching your kids healthy coping mechanisms while you handle stress can be an opportunity for your child to learn, rather than inhibiting healthy development.
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We want to know: How do you manage levels of stress in your daily life? We would love to hear about it in the comments below.
Author Bio: Erica Johnson is the Main Editor for Inner Parents and a very proud mother of two who’s passionate about the latest parenting tips & baby products.
Adriana Lopez Martin says
I commnet all moms and dads. Having kids definitely is challenging and living in the time we live right now stressful situations can develop and those feelings could transpire against the family and the kids. Being a parent is a difficult thing.
I can completely relate to this! As a fairly new parent, I am still learning how to cope with stress and STILL be there for my daughter. I know that she can tell when I’m stressed and it’s a terrible feeling to know it effects her as well.
Dawn Nieves says
When I’m feeling stressed, I try to take 5-10 minutes to myself just to relax and breathe. We all need little breaks!
Tiffany Khyla says
These are such important tips for any parent. I’ll have to keep this in mind for when I have kids and pass it along to my friends that do.
This is a great post. I have been working hard on not being so stressed when the kids are around. It can definitely be hard somedays though!
Lois Alter Mark says
These are all important reminders. Our stress can definitely result in kids feeling stressed. Of course, on some days, this is all easier said than done!